I'd give you part 2, but my Neo is missing, so instead here's a mean n' nasty letter to my local Whole Foods...

Dear Whole Foods,
Now, I know you cater primarily to the people who want to eat organically and save the Earth. That's absolutely fine. But, is there any way you could filter out the crazies?
Listen, I'm an understanding person, I will judge a book by it's cover from time to time but, I didn't need a cover for the folks down at your store.
For instance, an Edward Cullen-esk young man in a turban stopping an entire convoy of shopping carts so that he could Worship in the middle of our aisle? Really? is that acceptable? Or, better yet, the stupid Ladies who go there after their morning jog and decide that it's okay to get their sweaty hands all over the boxes they're not going to even consider buying? Or Jason, my cashier who likes to end my shopping experience with probing little questions like,
"Philanthropical or Charitable? are they the same?"
To which I want to reply:
Listen you hemp-lovin' Hippie! I'm not getting into a stupid debate with you over words! And yeah, they are the same thing. Shut up and scan.

And, after you say something like, Philanthropical and Charitable are vitually the exact same thing, He'll roll his eyes and grab your reusable bags and bag each and every item S-E-P-A-R-A-T-E-L-Y! NO JOKE! "Why is my soy milk in it's own bag? and my goat's milk and zucchini is over here, and my mango has it's own bag? What?" Ever heard of condensing? obviously not.


Oi Ca vah! I know this isn't a weight loss entry but, those people are making me wretch.

Defeat the want to eat

Today marks the first week of my NEW eating guidelines. Leaner meats, veggier veggies, and juicy fruits are what I am supposed to eat now.

Last Saturday and Sunday I tested out the portion control guidelines and cursed at the chapter about controlling your sugar intake. I've already lost 2 lbs., yay me!

It's been hard trying to get some exercise. Now that I've got my drivers permit, besides the cardio I give my Mom from imaginary brake stomping and panic attacks, I've been in a seated position longer than I've been in a bike, jogger, or crunch position. Sure, every M-W-F I'm up with my mom and lil' bro'tha exercising but that's not really enough considering I spend more time making sure they're actually doing the movements correctly and getting the full benefit.
When I started the PCG (portion control guidelines) last Thursday, I felt really good! I was smiling while munching on an egg white omelet and drinking naught but purified water from a jug. I'm taking in 1,200 to 1,500 calories each day, and I actually think that might be a little much.
Sound crazy? Here's my reason: On Tuesday, my menu called for Spicy Black Bean Skillet Medley (1/2 cup serving = 400 cal.) which I did not like at all. Instead of corn, tomatoes, and black beans smothered in hot sauce I opted for half a grilled turkey lunchmeat sandwich (1/2 sandwich = 250 cal.) and half a bag of "100 calories a bag: fudge striped cookies" and you've got a delicious lunch for only 300 calories. That day I consumed only 1,000 calories and boy did I feel energetic. I was in a sweeter disposition and actually got along with my older bro'tha! Weird!

I've gotten down 2 lbs. and am now at 236.8. I can't wait to see that ONEderful ONEderland of 170. I can feel it ready to explode outta me and onto the nearest passerby all the time. It's like a stalker, I know it's there sometimes I can see it, but how do I talk to it?
Speaking of stalker, just once I think it would be hilarious to see a celebrity stalking a fan as opposed to vice versa. There's some REAL tabloid news!
THIS JUST IN!! TWILIGHT VAMP HUNK ROBERT PATTINSON SEEN SNOOPING AROUND ALLEDGED VAMP FAN'S HOME!!

I would read that magazine.

Sarah