"Hey, um, are you really buying that stuff?" asked my gay friend, T. I shrugged my shoulders trying to look non-chalant about my purchase of Whey Protein Breakfast Shake Powder. "I thought I'dgive it a try." I said, placing it in my basket. T gave me a look of pity. "You know, I don't think you're putting any real effort into this whole losing weight thing." he said as he placed B12 vitamins in the basket, "How much do you workout anymore?"
I counted on my fingers, 6 am to 8 am is two hours, then 2pm to 3 pm is one hour, and finally 5 pm to 7 pm, two more hours.
"Five hours on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. Two hours on Tuesday and Thursday." I replied expecting him to be shocked with amazement.
"HOLY SH**!" he said, staring at me with wide eyes, "That is WAAAAYY too much exercising time! nobody exercises that much! That's just not healthy! Madonna doesn't even spend five hours a day on her body!" I looked at him, he was thin and frail. He's never been two pounds overweight, heck! He's probably UNDERweight! he'll never understand this struggle I'm going through. "You know, T, I'm really overweight. One hundred plus pounds overweight. I just want to lose this flab! How is that soo wrong?" I asked.
"Yeah, well, apparently you also want to kill yourself! You're never going to get skinny working out like that!" T and I were obviously at different ends of the Earth.
We walked up t the cash register, all the shiny and pretty wrappers on the candy bars caught my eye. "Why don't you eat one?" asked T, holding out a Twix. "I can't. I'll gain weight from those empty calories. I'll get some trail mix." I reached for the bag and placed it on the belt. When my items reached the cashier he grinned, "Looks like someone's on a diet." I chuckled "Actually.." I began to say before T cut me off, "She an exercise-aholic. She's like, anorexic." the cashier examined my physique, "I wouldn't say 'anorexic'. " Wow. Two people ragging on me at once! what am I? A-Rod? leave me alone! I wanted to scream at them really bad, "YOU'RE BOTH SCUM SUCKING WASTES OF SPACE!!" But istead I said "Okay, enough about me.." I paid for my things and headed to the car where my Mom was waiting. I got in and she looked through my bag. "Whey protein? what's that? It's not a diet pill, IS IT?"
"No, mom. It's just a shake powder. Like SlimFast."
My mom shook her head, "You girls are just alike! always obsessed with what your little bodies look like. Like anyone cares!"
I thought to myself, "Obviously, people care otherwise we wouldn't think Halle Berry was the sexiest woman, it'd be Kristie Alley."
My mom and I drove off in the opposite direction of T. Our ride was silent. Nothing said between each other. Finally she sighed.
"So, are you interested in getting a boyfriend soon?"
I rolled my eyes. I couldn't believe she says no one cares then she starts the 'If you just.." speech on me.
"A lot of guys would be interested in you, if you just lost a few more pounds."
I rolled my eyes again.
"And, I you just were a little more outgoing you'd meet a few more nice guys for potential suitors."
"I guess I need to lose some weight, then." I said, staring out the window.
"No, no, no! that's not at all what I'm saying!"
she said, pulling into our driveway, "You just need to be yourself!"
Really? well, this fat is not me, therefore, I'm not being myself. Every piece of her advice contradicts it's self.
I'm not that attractive to boys beyond a friend. I'm not worried about changing that status for a while. I am, however, worried about living long enough to be able to change that someday. I just need to do one thing right now.
I need to lose weight.
Sarah
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